Social Media: The Serial Self-Esteem Killer

The simplicity of a smile but it’s the only gesture she’s willing to lend.

Because of the pain she holds inside, there’s not one she trusts or depends.
No one suspects the worst or that she feels like dying inside,
No one realizes that she’s barely maintaining to keep her head held high.

She wakes up early in the morning to make up her facade,
And with the best foundation, she covers the tears that have dried.

Dressing in designer brands, the most exquisite in design,
Not even understood by complex individuals, it appears that all is fine.
Because she walks in the highest heels, and struts like she doesn’t care,
She feels that if no one knows, then that will do away with their stares.

With the darkest shades to hide her eyes and keep her a mystery,
Lip gloss, a slight shimmer, in attempt to conceal her misery.
Beauty is what others often call her, and with those compliments she’s pleased
but when she gazes in the mirror, that’s not at all what she sees.

Growing up, I was overweight. I lost the weight then rumors circulated that I had AIDS. My hair was what some call “nappy” so I cut it all off and then all of a sudden more rumors stirred, “…she must have cancer.” In addition to having a fade, my pants weren’t as tight as  people would like, so “Oh yes! Bye bye boys, she’s a lesbian!”

For years I went under scrutiny for my appearance and I learned that no matter what you look like, you can go to the extremes to be recognized with society’s perception of beauty, there will always be someone left unsatisfied with you. So what are you going to do? Keep tweeking until you look like a cartoon character or until one of those surgeries takes you out of here?

We see unrealistic expectations of how we should look or things we should have but the best lens in the business won’t tell you the truth. You see the nice Benz but never the struggle to get it or the driver when he rented it. You see a happy couple and you want that relationship. I bet you don’t want to suffer the defeat of sitting in the clinic with bad news because of that same unfaithful lover. You want a HUGE butt but not the ability to rotate your silicone as a result of implants gone wrong. Let’s not forget how cute her clothes are, that she stole from Forever 21!

The first time I hit 100 likes, I was on cloud 9! For what reason though? Because I wanted to “be like Mike” and that slight boost of confidence was exhilarating! Then what? “Bippity Boppity Boo!” My fairy godmother comes through in the clutch! She changes my flip flops into Louboutins, my napps into some Rapunzel hair and makes all my problems disappear? No, not a chance. Nothing! Living for the admiration of others, and finding a sense of validation in comments and “kissy face” emojis is pointless because that temporary happiness gets you absolutely nowhere! What if instagram crashes tomorrow? What if you never got another like? Will you kill yourself?

Stop letting your insecurities overtake you! If we could be a fly on the wall or have a backstage pass into people’s real “reality” and not what we are shown on MTV, we’d know better. We see tad bits of here and there and we want the lifestyle! We see a beautiful face and “she’s perfection!” Eh, maybe she’s just good at choosing filters. Wakeup!  All that glitter’s is not gold, it might just be from Hobby Lobby.

So when are you going to start loving the skin you’re in? Hopefully, before the pressure to be perfect kills your self -esteem.

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